Monkey Attack!!

Last week, a group of monkeys attacked a New Delhi deputy mayor by pushing him off his balcony. Those guys are crazy! Apparently in India, wild macaques roam the streets:

Part of the problem is that devout Hindus believe monkeys are manifestations of the monkey god Hanuman and feed them bananas and peanuts — encouraging them to frequent public places.

Tee hee. Who knew there was a monkey god? How about a squirrel god? Since America has no squirrel god, I elect Paws McBush (that's me) to be The God of Squirrels. If humans don't give us burritos and nuts, we will murder them. What do you say, guys? REVENGE WILL BE OURS. Oh, and today, Slate published tips for how to survive a monkey attack. But guess what? Nobody knows how to survive a squirrel attack. Think about it.

Love,

Pawz